“What you think of me is none of my business.”
I read this quote about a month ago and it resonated with me. Since I can remember, I’ve been the kind of person who worries about what others are going to think of me if I do this, or say that. This preoccupation has led me to live a life of constant worry; which equals wasted energy!
Here’s how that worry begins; with me asking, “what if so & so doesn’t agree w/ this,” or ” they’re not gonna be happy w/ me if I do that” etc., etc. Wanting the good opinion of others is not what I’m talking about. That gets built up over time. As family, friends, and colleagues see your good and bad qualities, they hopefully come to value you for who you are. What I’m addressing here isn’t productive. You set limits on your potential simply because you don’t want to rub anyone the wrong way.
So what’s behind this way of thinking? For me it was fear. Fear of displeasing; of falling out of favor with someone. The reality is quite the opposite. It hasn’t won me more friends. I’m not daughter in law of the year and overall, I’m not a better person. I was never, nor will ever, be able to please everyone. I’m coming to terms with that. It is so ingrained though, that when I thought of posting this quote I asked myself, “what if it offends someone?” What I’m fully aware of now is that worrying about such things hasn’t helped me, and it doesn’t make me more likeable either.
If I was asked to rephrase this quote it would go like this, “You are entitled to your opinion of me, and it doesn’t bother me.”